April 23rd, 2021
This week is National Volunteer Week and we can’t help but feel grateful for all the amazing people that make up this community.
Today, we’re recognizing Melissa Riley, one of CANAAF’s most dedicated volunteers. For those of you who know Melissa, you know she is a bright star of love and compassion that those of us with alopecia look up to. Melissa has been with CANAAF since 2014, and currently sits on the CANAAF board as Vice President and Halifax Representative, leads the CANAAF Kids Club, as well as the Halifax Support Group.
Below she shares her family’s story, including a couple of her most valuable lessons.
Thank you Melissa for all that you do! CANAAF would not be the same without you.
My name is Melissa and I am proud to call Halifax, Nova Scotia my home. I live here with my two boys, Matthew and Jacob. For the past twelve years I have operated a family home daycare. I also work part time as an office administrator/bookkeeper. I love to read, bake and go for long walks in the woods or by the ocean. I have been on the CANAAF Board of Directors for six years, including the past three years as Vice President.
I was first diagnosed with alopecia when I was eight. It started with my eyebrows and eyelashes and progressed to small spots on my head. By the time I was a teenager, I had more bald patches than hair. After having a biopsy, it was discovered that I had cicatricial, also know as, scarring alopecia. Over the years my hair has continued to fall out. I still have a bit left, mostly on the top of my head. I usually shave it off a few times a week.
I didn’t shave my head and get my first wig until I graduated from high school. After that, I went through college, got a job, got married and started a family. I was happy wearing a wig. When I was 34, I developed a latex allergy and all of a sudden I wasn’t able to wear a wig anymore. Overnight, it was gone. It was the scariest point in my alopecia journey. Up until then, I had felt in control. The wig was effective at “hiding” my alopecia and I didn’t have to explain it unless I wanted to. Once the wig was gone, I felt so exposed. People look at you differently when you’re wearing a scarf or hat. They also assume you have cancer. I didn’t like that.
Coincidently, around the same time I gave up my wig, Jacob also developed his first bald spot, so I started looking for support. I thought the support would mostly be for him and it wasn’t until I attended my first CANAAF conference that I realized how much I needed it too. I came home from that conference, took off my scarf and went out bald in public for the first time, holding my kids hands. Ever since, I only wear a hat for warmth or sun protection.
I remember arriving at my first CANAAF conference in 2014 and feeling like I was home. It’s heartwarming to be around people that share the same experiences and look like you. I’ve made so many great friends and memories over the years. CANAAF is a big part of my life and I’m very thankful. I feel empowered and confident, and I love having alopecia. It’s part of who I am and I wouldn’t want to change that.
Melissa’s 2 Pieces of Advice
